Benefits of Alone Time

Yes. Just yes. That's all that came to mind while reading this article. It was amazing how every idea I was reading was either an idea I had either previously thought of; whether it was while selecting my topic or when I was thinking about what to write about for my first post; or, even better, I completely agreed with even though the thought had never even crossed my mind. This was so fascinating for me, truly, because it all just clicked in my brain. This person who had written this article in some magazine I've never seen before was thinking and writing about the same thoughts and ideas as me! I was glad that I had some different ways of phrasing ideas that would maybe get stuck in my head because I was unable to word them comfortably. 

For example, when I reason 6, which reads "By spending time with yourself and gaining a better understanding of who you are and what you desire in life, you're more likely to make better choices about who you want to be around. You also may come to appreciate your relationships more after you've spent some time alone." I was shocked at how similar my train of thought was to this, but the biggest difference was that I had never mentioned this as a reason because I thought it would be considered too taboo and maybe even flat out strange. But seeing this stranger writing it in a magazine suddenly makes it okay for me. Strange, but honest. 

Spending time with myself is still one of my favorite things in this world. However, as intriguing as I did find this article, I do disagree with it during certain points. One of the biggest areas of disagreement is how and when this alone time should be spent. More specifically, when the article says "Turn off your cell phone" and  "Schedule solitude. Literally. Mark off time in your day planner or calendar for spending time with yourself." These are two of the last things I would think to do when thinking about my alone time. Part of what is so great about MY alone time (this clearly does not apply to everyone as the article says differently) is that it doesn't have to be scheduled. I only need it when I need it. That is to say, when I am stressed, I will seek out my fortress of solitude. I will shut the door, as advised by the article, because I do not wish to be disturbed or interrupted. But without my phone, I have no music. And without music, my ability to focus on my thoughts I wish to ponder upon decreases rapidly. Music is the driving force behind my thinking periods, because it allows me to peacefully fade away into my brain, while my conscious mind is stimulated by the music, my unconscious mind is busy solving all of my biggest and/or most threatening problems at hand. 

But these disagreements are the only such dissimilarities that stand out between my ideas and those of the article. We certainly agree on what is one of my main points, which the article opens up with by saying "The great omission in American life is solitude; not loneliness, for this is an alienation that thrives most in the midst of crowds, but that zone of time and space free from outside pressure which is the incubator of the spirit. -- Marya Mannes, author and critic" In today's constantly connected world, finding solitude has become a lost art. In fact, Western culture tends to equate a desire for solitude with people who are lonely, sad, or have antisocial tendencies." I feel it is necessary to apologize for using such a long excerpt from the article, but it is too good not to use the whole piece. This quote represents the opening quote and half of the first paragraph, and it speaks the truth. Solitude is so different from loneliness that it frustrates me when people confuse the two. Being alone does not equate to loneliness, I can't stress it enough. Sometimes, after a stressful day, or perhaps even a great day, it is nice to sit alone and reflect on all the moments that bothered you or moments you will cherish forever. Without this simple moment of solitude to reflect, one can very easily get lost in the daily hustle and bustle and look over all the good memories they have, and possibly forget them. 

I can feel myself approaching the end of the list of topics to discuss in this post so let me leave you with this, if you enjoyed reading this at all or even had one moment where you thought something was cool/interesting/intriguing, please take a moment to read these articles. They truly are fascinating. 

Source: Psychology Today- 6 Reasons You Should Spend More TIme Alone

Other Interesting Article: The Benefits of Spending TIme Alone

Solitude

For my free-write topic in class I decided to choose solitude. Being alone is something that many people are afraid of, but I consider myself to be the complete opposite type of person. This is not to say that I am a recluse or a misanthrope, it just means that I occasionally have introverted tendencies. I love being able to be alone and not be bothered by other people. It allows me to relax, collect my thoughts, and enjoy some music. When I was originally thinking about why I chose this topic, I had no clue. I had simply chosen because I knew it was a topic I would be able to easily and consistently write about, because it really is an activity, if you will, that I enjoy. Then, last night, while I was procrastinating severely by playing some Grand Theft Auto V, I had an epiphany. I was doing exactly what I was supposed to be writing about. I was listening to one of my many calming playlists, all of which are crafted for different scenarios; such as being alone, with friends, night-time or daytime, and other specific situations; and I suddenly realized that I wasn't doing anything. In this sandbox game where I can do just about anything I imagine, I was driving around aimlessly, trapped in thought by my music. Then I started (consciously) thinking a little harder. All day long I had been home alone, enjoying watching football and eating non-stop. But when my dad got home it only took me about an hour and a half to get to a point where I just wanted to be alone again. When I left my dad I rationalized it as being tired of football, which wasn't completely untrue because fantasy football was once again driving me up a wall, but I only realized later that I simply wanted to be alone. After I had gone through this conscious train of thought I returned to my playing of Grand Theft Auto V to try to be productive, as contradictory as that statement might sound, there is an underlying truth that I can still be productive while playing Xbox because it is something that I enjoy. But no more than 20 minutes later, I popped out of my day dream to notice that I was, again, driving around aimlessly and had just been lost in my thoughts. I decided to just succumb to this cycle, because the previous night I had not been able to have any solitude, as I had been at a costume party, and it is not normally socially acceptable to not be social at a party and just go hide somewhere and think, besides that would be very strange I wouldn't have enjoyed that anyways. Having some alone time is not me trying to get away from other people, it is when I am already away from other people, and I have enough time to think and wonder to all my heart's desire. So this lack of focus on Grand Theft Auto V was me making up for one night without my typical pre-sleep routine of being lost in thought. The events of this night made me realize that it is only natural for me to want, maybe even crave, solitude each day. This is the only time when I can be left alone to collect my thoughts, reflect on the past few day's events, and have some peaceful relaxation. It almost always involves music of some sort, because the music is what gets the ball rolling for me, and music is such an important part of my life, there is no reason that I shouldn't listen to music when I'm potentially making huge decisions, or maybe simply reflecting on some happy moments.